It’s real. It’s real and it’s really happening.
In one week, I will be on a plane heading to Cambodia.
I’m in a spot of weird mixture of excitement and trepidation. I’m excited because I’m going back. That’s obvious. That’s exciting. I can sometimes hardly contain myself when I think about it (ie., now – I’m teary-eyed with excitement and thankfulness).
I’m not sure if I’m supposed to admit to the world that I feel like something is going to fall through, or something bad is going to happen. I don’t know if these feelings have any foundation other than I’m a worse-case-scenario type of person.
Maybe I’m just supposed to lie to everyone and only talk about how excited I am. I am excited. VERY excited. I may get a chance to meet Seha (the boy I sponsor. my boy.)! That’s exciting. AND, I’m going BACK to Cambodia because the Lord saw the desire of my heart and blessed me. That is exciting. AND, I get to see my Cambodian friends. That is exciting. AND, I get to make more friends and spend another two weeks in Cambodia. That is exciting.
But, friends, if I am to be completely honest… there is still that one little nagging feeling that something is going to go awry. This one tiny bit of me is enough to keep my super-excitement from being mega-awesome-incredible-excitement.
Lame. I know.
BUT – I know the Lord is watching over me and has planned out this trip already. I am taking comfort in knowing this is exactly where He wants me to be right now.